Mesmerism Two

Small format collage (4" x 3") using scanned in cutouts and torn paper. Assembled digitally. Might call these "Half n' Halfs".

Title is Mesmerism Two, a companion piece to an earlier (and favorite) collage of mine.

Chance Cutouts Illustrating Mental Fluctuations

So how've you been feelin' lately? Exhibit A:

Exhibit B:

Cold Comfort

Pardon the less-than-optimal scan, but I was so excited to finish this tray that I slapped it on the scanner before the glue was even dry!

"Cold Comfort"
8" x 8" wood tray
painted with about 9 layers of acrylics
Union Carbide "star sapphire" advertisement
Mosaic skull cutout from 70's TimeLife series

Conjunctio

Most recent commissioned digital collage. Made from scanned old book flyleaves circa 1870-1890, a 1910-ish lithograph, moss-draped tree from a 70's Time-Life book about the deep South, stars from the cover of Thalassia, a deep sea temperature measurement book from 1877, and some recent pictorial delights downloaded from Bibliodyssey (the eclipse and the moon-reacher).

Leonid Andreyev's "The Red Laugh"

Narrated by a Russian army officer fighting in Manchuria in 1904 (Russo-Japanese war)

"Are you afraid?" I repeated kindly.
His lips twitched, trying to frame a word, and the same instant there happened something incomprehensible, monstrous and supernatural. I felt a draught of warm air upon my right cheek that made me sway-that is all-while before my eyes, in place of the white face, there was something short, blunt, and red, and out of it the blood was gushing as out of an uncorked bottle, such as is drawn on badly executed signboards. And that short red and flowing "something" still seemed to be smiling a sort of smile, a toothless laugh--a red laugh.

miniature collage and reverse painting under glass

Put Up or Shut Up, an Art Primer

I received an email in my Etsy account from a charming gentleman who thought it would be a giggle to bait an artist with backhanded compliments and a heaping dose of complaining about the prices of my decoupage pieces.

Here's the email, so everyone can share the glow of a total stranger's insults/compliments regarding my artwork:

Usually I don't like "art" but yours is pretty good. I even had the thought that I wouldn't mind buying some, a thought I've never had in my life and which feels half-unconscionable. Don't you think $60's a little much though? That isn't to belittle your effort or the product, of course, and it may even be that the cost of materials (to a reasonable extent) dictates that exact price for all pieces. Only wondering if you're not putting the cart before the horse, as it were, as artists tend to do these days.

In any case you make beautiful shit. I would probably buy that box for $60, though I see it isn't for sale. You should make more like that. I think if I had something like that on my shelf, I'd be able to sleep with artsy chicks, at the very least.

Guess what folks? If you think artwork or crafts are "too expensive"* and feel compelled to write and berate the artist or craftsperson for having the audacity to charge money for their work, I have a few suggestions for you:

1) Shut up.
2) Try to make the object you're complaining about yourself. I'll even give step-by-step instructions on how to make one of my "too expensive"* decoupage boxes.

• First, try to find an old wooden box or a newly constructed one that isn't wobbly, rotting, cracked, made of poor quality wood, or ruined with layers of cheap varnish. Have fun sourcing these, as they are harder to come by than you'd imagine.
• Pay between $5 and $30 for the box if you find one.
• Sand the box with at least two different grits of sandpaper. Multiple times. (Sandpaper costs about $1 or $2 per sheet these days-good luck being thrifty with it.)
• Paint the box carefully with Gesso or Wood Sealant with foam brushes or wide, soft-bristle paintbrushes. (These things also cost money. Imagine that!)
• Wait at least 30 minutes to an hour between coats if you want to "rush" through the paint prep step. And if you mess up and leave lumps or brush strokes, guess what? You have to sand again and re-paint.
  
• After letting the base coats dry completely, sand again with the finest grit sandpaper or steel wool. Wipe with a microfiber cloth to make sure there's no dust on the surface. Microfiber cloths ALSO cost, you guessed it: Money!
  
• Now it's time to start the many, many coats of acrylic paint. Expect to do at least 3 base coats of one color before venturing into the wonderful world of layering color and glazes. A small box can easily take a whole tube or 6 oz bottle of acrylic paint. Again, $$.
  
• Once the base coats are dry (you'll have to leave the box alone for a day to dry thoroughly), you can start adding coats of crackling glaze ($$), secondary colors, etc. Each coat of glaze will need to dry for at least 12 hours. A bottle of Glaze is expensive, by the way, and you'll need several varieties. Expect to go through a lot of it.

Are you bored yet? Tired of waiting for paint to dry? Maybe think this is a lot of trouble to go through just to make some "art"?

• Well get ready, because it ain't over yet. Once you've added about eight or nine coats of various glazes and paint colors in patterns that don't look like a kindergartner's finger painting project, you can do some detailing with a fine brush and some metallic paints/fine grains of sand, etc for added visual effect. Let this dry (again with the drying time-what are we at now, a week or two?), and then you're finally ready to move on to the decoupage part of the project.
• Oh, wait-not quite! You'll now have to seal the paint with a couple of coats of lacquer. 24 to 48 more hours of waiting...then...
  

Here's where it gets interesting. I've spent over 10 years steadily practicing and honing my skills with scissors and exacto blades, learning to cut all types of delicate paper without tearing it or leaving ugly borders around the objects I'm trying to use in my collage/decoupage work. One might think it ain't no thing to pick up a pair of scissors and cut out a picture, but I challenge you to give it a try and see how hard it is to make it look right or not ruin it altogether. Especially with 100 year old paper. Have fun. Oh, and scissors and blades cost money too!

• Spend an insane amount of time hunting down exactly the right illustrations to use, from a library of images you've spent 10 years accumulating.
  
• Once you've settled on your theme and your pictures, begin the process of cutting everything out perfectly. Remember, if you screw up, you can't go back and fix it. Cutting out the pieces can take several hours. Keep in mind that these hours are spent hunched over a special cutting mat under a bright light with an exacto knife and scissors. Make sure you have a comfy chair.
• Once the pieces are cut out, it's time to take a deep breath, cross yourself if you are the religious type, and embark on the wonderful adventure of Gluing. This is the most crucial step, and can ruin the piece if everything is not done perfectly.
• Depending on the type of paper used, you'll want to lightly "pre-soak" some of the pieces, which means dipping them in a small bowl of water briefly and hoping the ink colors don't run immediately. If you make it past this step, you can start brushing on the diluted Mod Podge with a fat paintbrush or your fingers.
  
• The glue will have to completely cover the back of the cutout, but not too heavily. Too much glue can cause the paper to rip, too little will cause the paper to bubble up once you glue it down.
• Start gluing the pieces down, one by one, using gluey fingers, toothpicks, a small squeegee, anything that won't rip the wet paper and will smooth it perfectly to the painted wood beneath.
• If you are successful at this, consider it a miracle, and celebrate with a stiff drink while the glue dries. (A couple of hours.) You might get an unpleasant surprise if you don't check on the drying process repeatedly. Paper shrinks as it dries, and mistakes become glaringly apparent.
• Now then...if you've managed not to mangle the paper, screw up the paint, and have cleaned off the excess glue VERY carefully, you can now let the piece sit for another day or so before embarking on the 2 to 3 week adventure of Lacquering!

Authentic Decoupage methods require at least 10, preferably 30 coats of lacquer. In this day and age, we have many different sealants, lacquers, etc to choose from, but it's all pretty nasty chemical-ly stuff. And it is not cheap. If you choose the wrong kind, you can, once again, ruin all that work you've put into making this piece. A good clear satin polyacrylic is my choice, but it took me quite a while of experimenting before settling on this.

• Clear off a large workspace with good ventilation (unless you want to sacrifice more braincells than are necessary) and prepare to lacquer a 3-dimensional object, with all the harrowing chances for mistakes this entails. Lacquer runs easily, and if you don't know how to smooth out dripping lacquer, you'll see the drip-lines in your piece forever.
  
• Each layer takes 24 hours to dry to the touch. Keep in mind that you can't coat the entire piece with each pass. The bottom and inside of the box will have to be done as a separate step, which is always fun.
• After you've waited 24 hours between each layer for each part of the box (do the math!), you'll need to wait a full two weeks for the piece to cure. If you skip this step and sell it to someone, they'll be pretty pissed, as things will stick to the lacquer and it can be easily dented.
• Oh, and make sure the piece is fully shielded from dust/debris/etc the entire time it is drying/curing. Again, it's easy to ruin all of your work with some stray pet hairs.
• If you've made it this far- you're done! Now you too can try to "swindle" people into buying these cheap trinkets for the exorbitant price of $60 to $80!
  

Here's a nice little math problem for you: If I paid myself $10 per hour to make these objects, how much should I charge? $2000? I actually have a day job that pays my mortgage and my bills. I'm not a "starving artist", and I actually create these objects because I love doing it. My advice to anyone who wants to complain about my pricing:

Get a flippin' hobby.

* Please note that I'm charging a pittance for my stuff on Etsy. It is underpriced by at least half of what it "should" cost, considering the work put into each piece. Because of this email, I have now actually raised my prices. My artist friends know they can always TRADE me for pieces.

Springtime's Larder

Annual Spring Collage

10" x 12"
Traditional paper collage using endpapers from late-19th century textbooks, a varnished 19th century lithograph, architectural picture from 1960's book about Lippizan horse training, 1913 children's encyclopedia illustration, 1923 Science textbook illustration of collected hawks, etc.

To be framed in repainted oval early 20th century gesso frame.

Printemps, Hâtez-vous et ouvrez les portes!